Candy. I love it. And yes, unfortunately, it shows. *Sigh* Gravity thou art a cruel bitch.
Why is it when you find a really good candy bar or sugary treat, all of a sudden they stop making it? I mean, seriously, if you are selling at least one of these puppies a day, why would they manufacturers discontinue it? It is very disappointing and very cruel to a palate that has become accustomed to it's weekly (alright, daily) treat.
I am speaking, of course, about the Marathon bar by Mars. Not the Marathon bar that is out there today that is supposedly an "energy" bar. Heaven's no, far from it! the Marathon bar of which I am speaking of was braided caramel then dipped in milk chocolate. It was twelve inches of pure gooey sweet goodness. (Alright you sick puppies, I am talking about a candy bar here...)How did I know it was 12 inches? It had a ruler on the back of the wrapper. So there. >:P
When I was a kid, after church on Sundays, we would go to the Station and get milk, bread, a Sunday paper, a carton of cigarettes for Dad (sorry to air dirty laundry, daddy) and my sisters and I could pick out a treat. I would immediately go for the red and yellow wrapped Marathon bar. It was like manna from heaven. (Ironically, on a Sunday.) Big Sister would get a Nestle Crunch and little sister would get a Lolli. (Remember those?!)
One Sunday I remember going to the Station and went immediately to look for my Marathon bar. Where was it?!? Dear God, please, I really need that Marathon bar. "Mom," I said tugging on her shirt, "can you ask where their Marathon bars are?" My mother, being the polite person she was asked Aachi behind the counter if they were out. "I'm sorry, they don't make them anymore." Aachi replied in her soft Asian accent.
WHAT!?!?! The candy company did not realize what this act could do to a child of 9. My candy world was spiraling out of control! What was I going to eat now?!
"Jenny, just get a Milky Way. It's the same thing." Mom was fast becoming irritated.
The same thing?!? Was she crazy? "Mom, it is NOT the same thing! There is nougat in a Milky Way! There is no nougat in a Marathon bar! They are two totally different candy bars!"
Wow, her look pinned me to the floor. "Just pick out something different or don't get anything at all." Teeth clenched, lips pursed and eyes flashing angrily.
I figured I had about 20 seconds before she went into the arm grabbing dragging my 9 year old backside out the door. Heck, why not tempt fate and just throw a little tantrum. I haven't had a good lickin' in a while.
"MOM!"
I was wrong. That took about 2.5 seconds. "Get in the car."
Ok, I will admit. That was pretty stupid on my part. The teeth clenching should have tipped me off. I went to grab a Hershey bar. "Oh no, young lady, I said get in the car. The time to choose has passed. that little tantrum just cost you a treat."
Unbelievable! I was being denied a candy bar because of a little flare of temper? What kind of a world was this that a kid can be denied candy because of a little tantrum?
I hung my head and started to walk out the door. The little bell tinkled above my head and seemed to mock my pain. I looked back at my older sister. She was smirking at me while she nibbled away at her Nestle Crunch. She ate all around the outside of the NESTLE on it and then started to eat the letters one by one. How cruel.
I got into the 1967 Camaro. (Might I interject, it was a yellow and black rusted out Camaro.) And climbed into the back seat, arms folded across my chest, head hanging, eyebrows scowling. Heck, I didn't want a dumb ole' candy bar anyway. I wanted a Marathon bar. If I can't have a Marathon bar, I don't want anything.
Now, my question is this. Who out there remembers these little nuggets from years past?
Razzles- the candy that turns into gum. (Pretty crappy tasting gum that after 5 seconds loses its flavor and feels like you are chewing rubber.) Loved those, too. Used to be able to buy 4 packs for a dollar. You can still find those in some places but now those suckers are like 1.50 a pack. I don't know if my 5 seconds of childhood bliss are worth a buck and a half.
Milkshake candy bars. Malted milk flavoured nougat drenched in milk chocolate. We used to get these frozen at the Dairy-O in town. Those didn't last either. But the commercial jingle still sticks with me. "Milkshake *boom boom* Milkshake *boom boom* It's a candy bar!"
Chocolate Charleston Chew bars. Another candy bar that was 12 inches long and was a taste sensation! Milk chocolate over chewy chocolate nougat. I managed to find one of those in a convenience store in the Dells. I bought it. I was not immediately whisked back to childhood. It was more of a "Huh!" and that is about it.
They say that candy for kids causes them to be hyper and suffer from ADD and cause terrible acne breakouts. Don't know if that is true or not. When my kids have chocolate they don't immediately start running around the room like the Road Runner, or flit from one thing to another without sitting down. Nor do they immediately burst into pimples.
I still love candy today. When I was a kid, I was too busy being busy to ever gain weight. I was running it off or biking it off for it two stick around too long.
Now, it seems to hang around and just stay for the long haul. In fact, I swear it brings friends with it.
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